Thursday, April 26, 2018

One Last Thank You Note


Greetings! I’ve used this forum to process loss and celebrate life on many occasions. Those posts have covered a variety of people and things that hold meaning in life, including family, friends, celebrities, vehicles, places and our cherished family cat, Abishag. Last month Shannan and I attended the memorial service for the Very Reverend Bevel Jones. He was a Bishop in the United Methodist Church. I took a class with Bevel in graduate school. He had a profound impact on my life. One thing in particular I learned from Bevel was the power of gratitude. I use it regularly and I share Bevel’s story at the end of the term with EVERY single class I teach.


At Bevel’s service, I looked around the room. There were numerous women and men I know from school, work and the community. There were others in the room who have greatly influenced my life and the choices I’ve made. It dawned on me that many of the folks there were in poor health. Afterwards, I mentioned to Shannan the reality that we’d be attending more of these much sooner than anyone would like.

And so it is. April 14, 2018, The Right Reverend J. Chester Grey, III died. Chet had been ill for some time. This is not the place to chronicle the situation of my youth, suffice it to say, worse than being born into an unfortunate situation, I willfully made far too many bad choices. Around the age of 21, I finally attempted to make a change. It wasn’t working as I hoped. At that time, Chet was the Rector at Saint Bartholomew’s Episcopal Church. We met by happenstance. He recognized my situation at the time, and like no one before, he saw potential. I didn’t even believe him. I thought he was just saying things priests say to troubled souls. The truth is Chet Grey saved my life. Make no mistake, that is not an understatement.

Our time together wasn’t always an easy road. I’ve never been good at accepting help. I fought back. When I make positive strides, out of nowhere, I’d try to sabotage my own progress. Chet knew the only way to help me was to fight with me. Fighting was all I knew. It worked, and I’m so grateful.
More than once, I followed the lessons of Bevel Jones and made sure to tell Chet in words and writing of my abiding gratitude for his help, his guidance and his friendship. He was my boss, my priest, my mentor, my friend, my champion and the hero who pulled me from the wreckage of the past and shoved me into the potential of the future. For that, Chet Grey will have my enduring gratitude.

Say Thank You!

Tom

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